Nothing to say
Nothing to do
All we do is wait
Wait for what?
Why are we waiting?
Everything is falling
But no one does anything
Why don't we do anything?
Why, the most unexplainable word ever
Is so explainable to you
We're all waiting
Waiting to be good enough
But nothing is good enough
So all we do is thrive, and thrive
Just to be good enough
While we do not think we're good enough
All we do is wait and thrive to reach their high standards
But we are all thriving, ready to escape
I am always comparing
Comparing myself to you
Comparing myself to him
Comparing myself to people who are good enough
I am not good enough
I am not confident enough so my insecure thoughts, automatically go away
But does being confident make you not insecure?
I guess not
Because even the people who seem confident, underneath it all, are insecure
....What better time to write poetry then when your crying?
When you can't hold anything in anymore
And as the tears drop down by your face
Why is everything deem to be...so bad?
Nothing is the same anymore
We're not the same anymore
Reality is finally setting in
And I'm feeling all the pains of it.
All the true pains of Pandora's box
I have no hope
I'm tired of this
Tired of you
You, controlling me
Like some puppet
Is that what I am to you? Some puppet?
When everyone left you, because you weren't good enough like I was
Who was still there for you?
WHO? Tell me. Who?
But now, that your good enough, you treat me like a puppet.
A sick, tired, confined, puppet
And I'm tired of it
Tired of everything
One day, I'll be good enough
Then you'll see who the real puppet is.
Pretending For The Lights
Hiding, our true selves
To be accepted
It's only for the lights
Deep down under...We're the complete opposites, aren't we?
It's just the lights
I want to start over
And stop pretending
Since it hurts so much to pretend
You never know anything anymore
Because we're always pretending
Pretending.....One day someone will find out
And pretending for the lights
Will turn into accepting the lights
When the day comes where we accept the lights
Where will we be?
Standing, maybe 10, 20, years from now?
That is, if we're still even there
Growing up, the hardest thing to do
All I want to be is a kid
I've lost all the innocence I've had.....
Where has it gone?
I want to start over
Before it was like this
Where we work all day, and sleep all night
Nothing else, Nothing more
Why? Why can't we be children?
We all have to grow up,
But what if it pains you to?
Pains you to grow up?
One day, I'll be a better me
I'll be confident
I'll be stronger
I'll be better in everything I lack
One Day, You'll be a better you
You'll know me even more
You'll be better everything you lack
But today, I'll be a worst me
I'll be insecure
I'll be weak
I'll be worst in everything I lack
But today, You'll be a worst you
You'll not listen
You'll know the basic things about me
You'll be worst in everything you lack
Words, jumbled in my head
Where have you gone, and left me?
I wait here at the hollow’s eve
You’ve left me, completely as the wind blows my hair
Nothing is darker than dawn
Not even my heart, completely drifted away from my head
It tells me to go one way
I cower over it
Again and again and again
I see the immediate hatred in your eyes as you stare at me
You hate me, with a burning passion
Yet, I love you, with a burning passion
Nothing exceeds how much I love you,
Except for your hate
Your deep, deep, hatred
Hatred of me, that is
Your stare kneads into my skin
I can feel my head going faint
I can feel the sun rising
The thing I feel most, is remorse
Remorse for all the things that have happen
As I fall down at the bay,
I know what will happen next for sure
I will be dead.
Because your eyes, I have pierced through my heart
I wish I could be spontaneous
Jump out of my chair, cry without a care
Tell you the truth
Tell everyone the truth
Being spontaneous isn't just being carefree
It's being you.
Yourself, and only you
I want to be that person
You were spontaneous
You're always spontaneous
And I love it, every single part of it
I'm not going to run away anymore
I can't run away anymore, and I won't
I have to face the truth
The truth of you never being able to be mine
Your always running though
Running after her
Her, who doesn't care what you think
Her, who only sees you as the background
I see you, as the big picture
You'll never see it though
Because I run as fast as I can, so you won't see it
One day, I'll stop running
And I'll look back on the tracks I've left
Then I'll realize,
Finally realize you aren't good enough for me
But I'm not good enough for me either
Your hair, it's brown
Brown in the sunlight, when it hits you best
That's the only way I want to see you
I keep looking back, when days were better
When I could be free and not care about anything
But I look back, I look back at you
How were we back then?
We were so simple
There was nothing to fight or argue about
We weren't at our necks with insults, or crying
I've stopped crying
About you, that is
I cry about other things now
Other things you just don't seem to understand
Or you just don't want to deal with it anymore
Deal with me
I dare you
How you always challenged me to be better
I want to be challenged again
But, you won't challenge me. So who will?
No one seems to understand
Understand how much it hurts
No one takes anything seriously
They just brush it away
I used to be able to do that
I can't do that anymore
I face things head on now
But I somehow find myself running away
You, hitting me with everything you know about me
All my flaws, which is everything
I will face you one day
I will be better than you
I will hit you with everything I have
So we are equal, equal foes.
Stop the way you stare at her
Even if she won't notice you
Stop hurting me
Your not making yourself any better
I understand you, so why?
Why do I put up with you and her?
Even if she doesn't see you the way I do?
I just want time to stop
So I can see clearly
See everyone clearly, and maybe they'll see me clearly
What I mean, what I do
Is all for you
I always wait for you
Wait for you to learn
Wait for you to understand
I can't keep doing this
Doing this to myself
The pain is unbearable
But so is being without you
I will always wait, even if I can't
Without you I can't go on
Neither can you.
I wish for a lot of things
I wish for you
I wish for you to notice
I wish for you to realize things
Things like, who's been here for you
Who's always supported you?
Well? Who? Tell me who.
Maybe when I wish
They'll come true
Then you'll finally see the truth of things
But for now....
You'll be as blind as ever
You'll never see me
When I cry
When I smile
When I need you
You'll never give up
Give up on her
She never gave you a chance
But I have
I'm afraid of facing the truth
When the truth has a face itself
I'm afraid of you
When your nothing but an imagination
Why must I be so afraid?
What if there finally is a greater good?
And that greater good, is meeting you,
Even if your just my imagination.
Your all gone
Dead, spoiled, rotten bodies
I linger over your grave
It's as cold as ever
You were always so cold
So, your the same.
You never did live,
But you were never dead.
Your body is so rotted, yet nothing.
Nothing is inside of it to think.
Nothing is there anymore....Therefore...
You are dead.
Dead to me.
Seemingly, the most cherished thing in the world
But even I can't love
Because the only thing I love is you
And just looking at you sets a curse upon myself
I try, I try so hard to tear myself away
Tear myself apart, that is
I'm always bringing myself down
Because your always bringing me up
I feel as if I was fine, you'd leave me
Because there is no reason to talk anymore
We're not as close as we used to be
We've lost our touch
Now your bringing up other people
And I'm slowly bringing myself down with it...